Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Infertility Journey: Part 2

You can read Part 1 of my infertility journey Here.
After I got the news that having children naturally would be almost impossible I contacted a family member who I knew was diagnosed with infertility as well. I talked briefly with my cousin in law, Katie, to compare our situations. We had a ton of similarities but also a few differences. Talking with her was such a relief. I knew nothing about infertility or anyone who really had it. So, my mind was put at ease. She was getting ready to move to the area from Dallas and had already researched Reproductive Endocrinologist close to us. My husband and I decided to make an appointment just to get more information. When you are in this situation you are scared and nervous on what to expect.
My doctor, Dr Miller was such a blessing. He talked to us and explained every detail on why we were diagnosed with infertility and what it meant for us in growing our family. He would not let us leave until we had no more questions for him. I loved that he took his time with us instead of pushing us out in 20 min.
He said I did not fit the diagnosis of PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome) but that I had characteristics of it. You can read about PCOS Here 
We left thinking that we were just going to get information. I honestly had no intention of starting medications, having weekly ultrasounds and blood work. But Dr. Miller said if we wanted a baby sooner than later we would have to start treatments. We went home to discuss what we thought was best for us but it didn’t take long for us to decide that we wanted the blessing of being parents.
The first thing Dr. Miller wanted to do was blood work.  All of my hormones came back at a 1.7 which was normal but said he has seen improved fertility if the hormones were at a 1 or lower.  He started me on levothyroxine and progesterone to lower my hormones and prescribed Provera to help start my cycle.  He also prescribed Femara (which is a breast cancer drug and has been proven to help with infertility) to help me have an increase in egg (follicle) production.
After being on the medicine for a few weeks, I went for my first ultrasound to check on my lining and to see how many perfect follicles have formed.  My lining was perfect and I had two mature follicles. Everything seemed to be in alignment and I felt so confident that we would have a positive pregnancy test on the first month that we saw Dr. Miller.
We did not get the positive that we hoped for.  I was not upset.  Not heartbroken.  Not discouraged.  I knew my Dr. Miller and his team were doing everything they could to help my husband and I have that family we were dreaming of.
I was hopeful. 

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Infertility Journey: Part 1

Growing up I can remember loving baby dolls.  I was never interested in barbie dolls because barbies were older and I wanted to play Mama.  In my head I could only be Mama to my baby dolls.  There were times where my parents didn't see me for hours.  But, they were able to hear me opening and closing the hallway linen closet.  My favorite way to play with my dolls where to lay them down for nap time.  I had to make them comfortable so I would go back and forth to the linen closet and get bath towels for their blankets and wash cloths for their pillows.  I spent hours playing.
I loved playing the role of Mama.
As I got older I always new I wanted a family.  I couldn't wait to graduate high school and college, find a wonderful man...who my Daddy approved of...get married and grow a family through the years.  Not having children never crossed my mind.  Until the day that our world that I thought was so perfect, wasn't anymore.
Four months before our one year anniversary we decided now is the right time to get off birth control and just see what happens.  I wanted my body to be free of birth control for two months before we really started trying. 
After a few months I could tell something wasn't right.  I made an appointment for my yearly examine and I talked with my doctor on how I thought things did not seem right with my body.  She looked over my file and realized I never had a natural period.  Sometimes I would go months without having one while on the other hand I would have my period for months at a time.
She sat there telling me that I would have a hard time conceiving on my own without any medical intervention and that I had PCOS.  Thats it.  That is all she said. 
She gave me medicine to induce a period as well as medicine to help with the growth of follicles.
I left her office so discouraged.  I left confused by the lack of information she gave me.  I left heartbroken. 
When I got home I told my husband how confused I was and that I just wanted more information about what was going on.  I was so scared of the thought of never being called Mama.  I needed answers sooner than later so they could be "fixed."

Monday, June 3, 2013

Weekend Instagram Update

Happy Monday Ladies!

I think we were all spoiled with our three day weekend last weekend.  Wouldn't it be great if we had a mandatory three day weekend at least once a month.  Amazing!

In other news.....Instagram.  Where would we be without it.  Where else can you turn your picture of sweet tea in a mason jar into art work.  Ahhh the filters and cute effects that you can add. 

So in honor of Instagram, here is a little weekend recap.

1.  Favorite summer nail polish of the moment: I don't polish my nails often.  I am more of a pedicure type of gal, however Island Coral is rocking my world right now.  It is the perfect pink and coral combo.  

2. "The Hubs":  This guy has my heart.  Lucky him, huh? Our new Sunday tradition is stopping to get a biscuit before church.  And yes, he looked great in his salmon colored shirt.  

Created with an app called BeautifulMess
3. Italian Ice:  I haven't had Italian Ice since I was little.  We got stuck in the grocery store since it was pouring rain and The Hubs wanted to wait around in the store and wait till the rain cleared.  Bad Idea! I saw this little beauty while waiting and had to bring it home.  If your wondering, it was delish!

4. Humming Birds:  I am my fathers child.  He was a bird watcher.  This feeder was a gift from my in-laws for my birthday and it is the gift that just keeps giving.

5. The nephew:  No weekend recap is complete without a "please mama get me out of this thing" face from this handsome guy.  Declan had to attend a wedding this weekend and of course had to be dressed to impress.  He is such a handsome little dude. 
That's it!  Hope you lovelies have a fabulous nail painting, husband loving, ice cream eating, bird watching,  get me out of these fancy clothes week! 
How did you spend your weekend?

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Life after Loss

As I am sitting here I am watching 3 hummingbirds.  They are so small but one of God's beautiful creations.  When I was little my Daddy always would point out things in nature and could watch birds for hours it seemed.  I usually just entertained him and just chalked it up as OK...old people and their bird watching. Yeah Yeah.  But now, its completely different.  My husband and I love watching all the birds come to the feeders, love walking outside in the mornings and hearing the turkeys, raising the blinds so we can see the deer in the field.  We have turned into old married folks.  And I am Okay with that.  Daddy would be proud.

I have written about my Daddy before on this blog.  You can read about it Here.  He will never be Dad.  Always Daddy.  I grew up in such a happy home.  My parents are honestly the best. 
Growing up I always knew my Daddy was older but never really thought much about it.  I remember when I was 7 it hit me that he may pass away before all my friends' dads would.  It got me scared and worried.  I worried from then on about him passing away.  He was my Daddy and I wanted him to stay around forever.

When I was around 10 I remember staying at my grandparents house for awhile only to find out a few years later we were there while Daddy had surgery to remove cancer from his body.  When I was 21 Daddy had kidney cancer and he had surgery to remove one of his kidneys.  He took his meds and went on with life. He always went on.  He had a wife and two children to be around for.  At 23 I found out that he now had lung cancer. A cancer cell from his kidney before it was removed traveled to his lung.  Daddy took several chemo and radiation treatments but later on had to have surgery yet again to remove a wedge of his lung where the cancer was.  The cancer wasn't fully removed but it was slow growing so we were worried but not on high alert. 

Then in October he went for his normal check up and was told that he had pneumonia and was admitted into the hospital.  I remember him looking "fine."  He even was laughing because he couldn't believe he was admitted.  Day after day Daddy went down hill.  On December 19th I watched him take his last breath.  My Daddy was a fighter and I know he didn't want to leave us.  I wasn't ready for him to go.  All I could keep thinking was "what are we going to do without him?"

But, we are making it.  It has been a little over seven months and we are still standing.  I have my moments and I would give anything for a hug or even have him ask me to give him a back rub (which I hated doing...he was so picky)
My husband calls me spoiled all the time and says how much I act like my Daddy.  That's the best complement anyone can give me...that I am like him.
There are always going to be bumps in the road.  Death is a bump we all have to deal with.  I hated losing my Daddy, but what helps me get through is that he is in such a better place than we are.  Death is Life and I know he is in heaven rocking my little angel.  

Saturday, June 1, 2013

How do you say hello after 9 months of not blogging??

I have been a horrible blogger.  No excuses just been in a blogger slump I guess.  I am still a Southern Newlywed but I was interested in a new blog name and new look.  Bumps Along the Way is something I can relate to now and in the future.  I wont always be a newlywed but I will always have "bumps."  Bumps are Highs and Lows.  Something everyone can relate to. 
Jack from Hubby Jack's Blog ATTACK deigned my new layout on le' blog.  He follows a lot of my favorite bloggers and he did a great job designing something clean and simple for me.  I love chevron and hints of pink!  Go over and check out his designs!
The past nine months for me have been like a roller coaster.  So many blessings and a lot of heartache. 
I've been holding a lot in and I think the best thing for me to do is blog about it.  This is my blog.  There will be times where I write for myself and times I write for others.  Follow me as in my next few posts I will talk about losing my Daddy, buying land for our future dream home, and our infertility journey.